The Lie: "When I get what I want, I'll be happy." The Truth: "You'll be about as happy as you decide to be."
Why do we wait for Friday, for a raise, to lose that last 10 pounds, or until everything is “perfect” to be happy? Why do we base our happiness on getting something or somewhere? Why can’t we be happy now? As is. Without changing anything. In this job, in this body, with this house. Now. Happiness that does not depend on something else. If we are always waiting to be happy, then what happens to now? To your life? In actuality, we will be HAPPY when we stop wanting. When we begin to live our life, now, in the present moment, AS IS. It is safe to say that the ultimate goal in life is to be happy. We all want to be still and at peace, but often times do not realize it. We want things and we buy things, and that brings us peace. Because then the mind is still: the wanting has subsided. For a moment. But it wears off and we want the next thing. Have you ever dreamt about a new car? Gone for a test drive, saved your money, carefully selected the perfect color interior & exterior, and planned ahead to purchase the new car? Then finally one day you acquire it. That itch (the wanting) has been scratched. You have found peace. Ahhh. The want is gone. And then you pull up at a stoplight and look to your left. What kind of car is THAT? That is a beautiful car! Uh-oh. Here we go again. Can we train ourselves to make HAPPY our “neutral”?
Yes, we can. Because happiness is a choice. We get to decide that we are happy. Even if things are not perfect.
We choose to start and end each day happy. In Sanskrit, SUKHA means happiness or ease. (Literally translated, SU means good and KHA means space: Good Space.) The opposite is DHUKHA which means suffering or dis-ease. And so, there are essentially two ways we can go thru life: we can accept & allow things to happen and be okay with it (ease), or we can resist (suffer). Sure, we can wish for things to be different, we can wait to be happy until we fit into those jeans, or until we have a bigger house, but where does that get us? It gets us to unhappiness, to suffering. It supports the illusion that things can be different than the way they are. Things happen and things change. We cannot control what happens, but we can control how we react to that change. Change is like flowing water. If we allow it to flow, it is pleasant to watch. But if we try to stop the water and create a dam, the water will resist and try to escape. There will be a struggle. We must allow the water to flow, to go with the flow, and ride the wave. It’s your choice. There is a Sanskrit saying, "As the mind, so the man: bondage or liberation are in your own mind.".
If you feel bound, you are bound.
If you feel liberated, you are liberated. Create a Good Space. Choose Happy.